M48
Add to basket.
August 05 2013
Comments
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RHP User
12 years ago
Men that do this are not capable of attracting a strong independent woman so they go to countries where they think women will be more submissive and due to their circumstances, not as fussy. These men are, how shall I say it, not the cream of the crop if you know what I mean. When you have to buy it.... Well. I feel sorry for the mail order brides... If there economic prospects are so poor they have to marry a loser. I am sure I will get slammed for that. But that is what I honestly think.
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RHP User
12 years ago
So not an insult to Australian women at all, they would all rejected the guy after all. I just feel sorry for the overseas women. Believe me OP, they wouldn't be doing it if they didn't have to.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Thank you Meeka, if someone slams you for your opinion then that's their issue not yours. I asked for people's honest opinions and am taking them all on board.
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RHP User
12 years ago
To feel that the only way out of poverty or the only way to improve your situation is to marry someone you don't know... Awful. I can't even begin to imagine. The men, want someone who will be grateful to them. I think on one hand they are very lonely and on another they want an old fashioned submissive wife who does as she is told. An awful, exploitative situation.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Thank you Awesome for your comment. ( I don't really "know" anyone so hopefully no-one is offended by me calling them by their username?)
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RHP User
12 years ago
it's not the man choosing the bride, but the other way around. The end result is just as sad.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Some guys arnt blessed with great looks that attract a hot Aussie babe. Or even any Aussie babe. Don't that get the chance to have a good looking women just cause they are ugly? And I no so many women in Australia that a so superficial and will only go out with a guy for his money or cause all of her friends will envy her. So it goes both ways.- Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
12 years ago
Good to hear from the gents on this. I really had no clue how other people felt about this. That's why I asked.
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RHP User
12 years ago
I guess I should explain why I'm asking, so you all don't think I'm a uni student trying to do his thesis (I'm not smart enough to go to uni anyway haha)... I recently got back from Thailand and I noticed a few older Caucasian men walking around with younger Thai women, and from her body language they weren't in a relationship, I'm assuming it was a holiday girlfriend. I also noticed how many Aussies were over there (especially Patong) and it got me thinking how many men go over there looking for wives. I had people I know ask me if I was going to bring back a bride (or fuck a ladyboy), so it's obviously in the Aussie mindset. I know Thailand is not the only country men visit, it was just my example.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'Meeka100' Men that do this are not capable of attracting a strong independent woman so they go to countries where they think women will be more submissive and due to their circumstances, not as fussy. These men are, how shall I say it, not the cream of the crop if you know what I mean. When you have to buy it.... Well. I feel sorry for the mail order brides... If there economic prospects are so poor they have to marry a loser. I am sure I will get slammed for that. But that is what I honestly think. Of course you honestly think that ... and this is what I honestly think ... your perspective has been poisoned by your experience here. You now believe that your "strength" and "independence" is responsible for the ease with which you can pick and choose your suitors when in reality it is simply the overwhelming weight of numbers and the general promiscuity and undiscerning nature of men when it comes to their sexual partners.The OP is talking about marriage not a quick fuck with a stranger sourced from the internet. If you think the "cream of the crop" of men would rather marry an obnoxious woman whose goal is to remain steadfastly independent than one who is looking to contribute and be a partner you are sorely mistaken.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Yep, that's what I was saying. Men that go to find wives. Obviously hit a sore spot for you. Maybe you are Thinking of ordering a bride off the net? My view has zero to do with Internet dating or looking to score a root, not even sure what the relevance of that is to this question? I am not picking and choosing anything here in RHP land either myself. I met people who I have become friends with in the forums, so my views are not skewed or jaded by my experiences on RHP. I have to be honest, all my experiences have been really good. And yes, I do believe that Australian women are strong and independent. I don't need to depend on any man. I can fend for myself, and very well too. If this makes me what? Less of a woman, or makes me obnoxious, well so be it. I will not bow down to a man, just because he has a cock. I am looking for equals, someone I can look up to and someone who inspires me. I want a strong man.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Absolutely. Men are preyed upon when they go to some of these countries. They are being used as a ticket out. Not all the time, but I am sure often enough. To me mail order brides is literally someone shopping for a bride. You are "paying" for her. How the hell can that be good? It's exploitation on all sides.
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RHP User
12 years ago
many women are attracted to men who are older and have more wealth than them....this practice is hardly new,it's just that we now have a ''romantic '' view in our first world culture of what marriage should be....but who is to say that all mail order brides are ''sad'' or down- trodden,in fact sometimes men are quite surprised to discover they have married a strong woman,not a submissive one. By the way,sometimes it is older women and younger men scenarios.I know an Australian woman in her 60s who is married to a much younger Balinese man.she is extremely happy with the arrangement and so is he...he also has a Balinese wife and children,shouldn't work but it does. Of course there are often difficulties with cross cultural relationships but don't always assume that people who enter such arrangements are pathetic losers.
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RHP User
12 years ago
I am not some dumb broad without a clue about men you know. I am a little insulted with the assumption that I am stupid. Or that I am getting men only because they are so easy or because its a numbers game. That I have nothing else going for me? I have never been about picking up lots of men ever, and I don't I ever will. I understand that some men will be insulted with my view. But it still is my view.
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RHP User
12 years ago
I used the term "Mail order bride" as a generic term everyone could associate with. I have been on a site that specialises in "Mail order brides" and the experience I've had is it's not as easy as looking at a catalogue and picking one.
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RHP User
12 years ago
So what do you have to do on this site then? How do you get a bride? Do the women put their criteria down? ... Just like RHP then. :P
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RHP User
12 years ago
They do have a certain criteria for sure. I've had many knock backs because I don't want my own children. The site also organises tours for you to rent an apartment and meet women in certain areas. The site was featured on Today tonight so it HAS to be legit right? RIGHT!?! Oh god, I wonder where my 10K went...... Ha
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Smilingwithfun
12 years ago
Why should a man be lonely? Who are we to judge his life? If all he is after is some company in his life, so what. Has he broken any laws? Is it so sad, those of us who for whatever reasons aren't lonely, lucky us, but don't pass judgement until you have walked in his shoes.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'Meeka100'I feel sorry for the mail order brides... If there economic prospects are so poor they have to marry a loser. Some people say these women are gold diggers that are just after wealth and money. If that's true, I'm sure they end up earning every cent.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'GavinMcSparkles'I recently got back from Thailand and I noticed a few older Caucasian men walking around with younger Thai women, and from her body language they weren't in a relationship, I'm assuming it was a holiday girlfriend. Type in "Beaver Feaver" in Youtube and you'll find part of the BBC Documentary "My boyfriend the sex tourist", set in Venezuela. This really proves the comment I made above about earning every cent. Sickening.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'Meeka100'Absolutely. Men are preyed upon when they go to some of these countries. They are being used as a ticket out. Not all the time, but I am sure often enough. To me mail order brides is literally someone shopping for a bride. You are "paying" for her. How the hell can that be good? It's exploitation on all sides. Not to mention, getting married, being married for a year or 2 and then she takes half of everything you own.
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RHP User
12 years ago
to find a mate, If i was a guy and I had a few dollars, the I would buy myself a pretty wife to take care of me.If I was poor and had my family to support and thats the deal guys, the man has to send money to the familythen yes I would sell myself to get some education for my brothers or sisters.I sell myself nowI am married and with that comes a roof over my head and a credit card, and I have become the breeder and given two children. everything in a relationship is an exchange and often its financial I could not live the life I have without my husband, and I have worked all my life , hard long hours but in the end he holds the money and I am happy to spend it. My neighbour has a wife from overseas and she adores him, I have met another friends bride who clearly did not like him so that did not work out at all.yes old lonely men and women can get badly burnt while seeking or falling for someone overseasbut we all need love, even if we have to buy it.I think at least they can go find a woman , and I hope they are grateful as hell and treat those women well.Ausie women, have no idea how hard it can be, being poor does not mean your not a strong woman.being independent woman is a luxury that we in the western world with good jobs and equality can afford to havetrust me , if war broke out in Australia and men ruled we women would be under the boot men would have what they pleased.,that civilised thing is as fragile as fairy wings and ripped off just as easy as can be.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'Lady_Tuscan'Ausie women, have no idea how hard it can be, being poor does not mean your not a strong woman.being independent woman is a luxury that we in the western world with good jobs and equality can afford to haveYEP, I AGREEtrust me , if war broke out in Australia and men ruled we women would be under the boot men would have what they pleased.,that civilised thing is as fragile as fairy wings and ripped off just as easy as can be.ALSO AGREE, THAT IS WHY I AM NOT GIVING UP MY INDEPENDENCE. ITS AN EQUAL PARTNERSHIP OR NOTHING.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Men and women have been trading money and security for looks and sex, respectively. Love only entered the equation a couple of centuries ago, or so. I understand the attraction on both sides and I don't see how it's out place to judge the choices of either party, assuming there's no abuse involved.
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RHP User
12 years ago
After my marriage broke I was strongly encouraged by two men, both lawyers as it happens, to get an Asian wife on the basis that they are more devoted, more loyal, more submissive, and so forth. I politely explained that if I wanted to buy a fuck toy I would get one of those battery things from a sex shop. I am lucky; I grew up in the bush surrounded by strong, independent, and determined women and then through a couple of degrees and in my career the ones that impressed me were still strong, independent, determined. I don't respect the blokes who take the grubby option. I do respect the women. My understanding, based on hearsay, is that many of them do an actuarial study and take a bet. The bet is, basically, that if they are, say, 25 and the bloke is, say, 50, then they will have about 20 years of peonage to the bloke, but then he will kick off and they will be 45 and, they calculate, get the house (or the caravan), have acquired some kids and have 30 years of relative comfort. This sounds hellish, and it is, but the deal is better than living in squalor and poverty and dying of a range of poverty-related diseases at an early age. And yes, doing the deal is a way of being strong and independent. The calculus of inequality is not pretty.
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RHP User
12 years ago
With the suggestion that those men that seek a wife overseas CAN'T attract someone in their own backyard. I think they've just given up trying, and it's an easy solution. My thoughts on the subject is each to their own. If they're both happy, who gives a rats arse?- Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'Meeka100' Quoting 'Lady_Tuscan'Ausie women, have no idea how hard it can be, being poor does not mean your not a strong woman.being independent woman is a luxury that we in the western world with good jobs and equality can afford to haveYEP, I AGREEtrust me , if war broke out in Australia and men ruled we women would be under the boot men would have what they pleased.,that civilised thing is as fragile as fairy wings and ripped off just as easy as can be.ALSO AGREE, THAT IS WHY I AM NOT GIVING UP MY INDEPENDENCE. ITS AN EQUAL PARTNERSHIP OR NOTHING. from women before us, so yes why would women want to hand back the power that others have worked so hard for us to get, both men and women. we are the lucky ones
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RHP User
12 years ago
Tell my why is it ok for people to jump on a boat and come Australia as an Asylum Seeker ( re forum Ohhh goodyI can't wait) in your opinion but not as a mail order bride? aren't both these trying for a better life than what they currently have? I have lived and worked over seas for a number of years and seen it both ways there are quite a number of Caucasian women that seek out just for sex, or marry Asian, Middle Eastern or European men so what is the difference. I may sound a bit sexist here but after spending my time working in a few different countries over seas there are some Australian women that could learn allot for European and Asian women.
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RHP User
12 years ago
1. Instead of man constantly spending his money on escorts or dates going nowhere, he can save all his money and get a mail order bride. Its a negotiation. She'll probably sign a prenup too. 2. Some men may not like what's on offer in Australia in terms of women. Plus these brides are normally gorgeous so the man may be superficial too or he might just prefer oriental or East European women (apparently more sexually liberated). It doesn't make them weak, and it doesnt mean every man treats them like submissive slaves. 3. Also agree that women can be superficial and the guy has no chance based on his looks or social skills or wealth status so he turns to a mail order bride. Lastly a friend of mine who was working on an engineering project in Russia explained it like this when you move to the poor areas...the men drink all day, take no notice of these women, beat them when drunk, and these girls work in the potato farms...so they want a better life too and to help their family without being sent to Europe or Dubai for sex work. Thats all- Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
12 years ago
Thank you Mesmerised for the welcome. I agree with the sex trade in these countries being disgusting, especially if its against ones will. For any human to have to be subject to horrendous conditions, in any line of work, is not right. For a lady to want to leave her own birth country to escape poverty is understandable. To create a better life for herself is a natural human desire. I think there are a lot of old lonely men who have what these women want, and vice versa. My own reason to put myself on a website that deals with "Mail order brides" was because I was extremely disheartened with the women in this country that I was meeting. This is not a generalisation and I know not all women are like this, but I was getting sick of being treated like shit by rude, chauvinistic, arrogant, bratty women with an over inflated sense of entitlement and more often than not believed themselves to be a member of a fictitious royal family. This, from what i have been told is not a unique experience I was having either. I'm all for equality, but the behaviour I was experiencing was not equal at all. So I started to look over the fence....and also why I came back to RHP where I have in the past met some very open minded and genuine women.
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RHP User
12 years ago
A mail order bride is looking mighty fine at the moment !
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RHP User
12 years ago
I'd seriously like to know the reasons why men would travel so far, pay so much, risk so much to marry, yet know so little of in a myriad of ways. I bless my big toes everyday that I was born in this beautiful country that I don't feel that I need to marry someone I have no interest in just to seek a 'better life'.Hey, just a thought ... do Australian women have websites to marry O/S men??? *skips off to research international golddiggrs.com*
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RHP User
12 years ago
I totally agree Mick. You just have to read the profiles of plenty of females on here and other similar sites....like 'must have 8" cock or bigger'. Superficial judgement is a major thing. I reckon it goes both ways, but its much more acceptable for girls to demand it of guys. We all have our preferences, but the way they are delivered can be cutting. On saying all that, the 60 year olds that go over and grab an 18 year old creep me out.
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RHP User
12 years ago
it's not uncommon for women to go to Jamaica, Kenya,Thailand and Bali..the Kuta Cowboys ,Balinese gigilos are famous for their long haired ,denim clad,half naked charms
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RHP User
12 years ago
The risk is no different to marrying an Australian woman, I've got a close mate getting taken to the cleaners right now by a cheating manipulative Aussie girl. Travel is nothing really these days and its cheap (for us Aussies) to stay in many of these countries. The reason they go, loneliness. Simple. Many guys want women with old fashioned values too and like me, are sick of the attitudes of some Australian women. That was why I wrote in the original post, is it an insult to Australian women that men would go overseas for a bride? I wondered whether women actually thought that maybe hang on, what's wrong with Aussie women if men are going overseas? And also is an insult to Aussie men that they feel the need to spend the money and travel to find a wife? I have a Russian Internet friend who was engaged to an Aussie guy, she was telling me that her experience with Russian men was not good. She said many were just pigs. Drunk and violent a lot of the time. So that's why she looked overseas. Thanks Freya for the insight, I had no idea.
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RHP User
12 years ago
I think you misunderstand me. I don't have anything against the women for doing it at all. I feel sorry for them because they don't have any better options. I was going to make a joke about preferring to take a boat here than marry some white dude I don't care about... But I thought that may have been going too far. Lol. As KingofthrRoad says, they have to wait 20-25 years to be free of the man, surely a boat ride and 5 yrs in an Australian concentration camp is better? Poor bloody women. That's all I have to say. Mind you that is not to say that both parties couldn't be very happy with the scenario. Of course they can, but I can't help but wonder, If those women & men (thank you Freya) would choose that life if they had other reasonable options available to them.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Yes I have seen the sex tourism and older ladies with the young 20 year olds on the Jamaican beaches. I don't think that is much better, well, it's a form of prostitution to me and I am sure it causes issues in their communities. How can your friends husband have another wife and family? Legally that is? And how does his young wife feel about it? Yes I know that money, land and titles, or how many cows or camels you can afford to give a man to take your daughter away, has formed the basis for marriages. I am lucky that I don't have to strike such a bargain. :)
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RHP User
12 years ago
Best Australian love story that hit national TV......Rhonda and Ketut!"Like a suuuuuuunrisse"FOXY
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RHP User
12 years ago
I am intrigued by the comments about Australian women and their attitudes and that we can learn from women in Eastern European and Asian countries. Like what exactly? I am genuinely curious. I have to admit I immediately assume that you are saying these women are submissive and bow down to the man... But that is presumptuous of me. What do you mean exactly? Like to point out that I am Eastern European, and fuck me some Of those women are fierce! Jesus! :O
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RHP User
12 years ago
Okay this is a complete stereotype based on my travels, family members and friends and other women I have met from Eastern Europe. Which would probably make up 0.00000000001% of them. But here goes. It's all very well saying we Aussies have something to learn from Eastern European women, but believe me boys. She may tell you what you want to hear, but after she has caught you don't do anything to piss her off, because she will fix you up faster than you can say "Fuck me where did my balls go".
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'Kizza1973' A mail order bride is looking mighty fine at the moment ! Oh Kizza, I say love, I say sweets, I say darl,..You don't have to go far we WOW are just over the boarder ya know.Stick yourself in an Express Post Parcel...You'll be here in not time!!FOXY
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RHP User
12 years ago
All judgement has elements of self reflectivity to it....all judgement.My father met a russian woman online who he married 2 years ago,she is 10 years his junior hes 63,she spends 4-6 months a yer in russia with her family and the rest in ireland with him,they are happy.He was lonely and bitter after my mother left him 10 years previous and she was the same but living in siberia,which i`m sure even to the most deadened of imaginations can be visualized as a harsh and unforgiving place to live and look for a mate in your 50`s.Its an arrangement,but a happy one and suits both and they are both consenting adults and tbh i can see they care for each other more and more each day and thats a beautiful thing.A preference IS a personal choice and should be respected,wether its looking for a partner at your local boozer(heaven forbid)or finding or even getting one for that matter from half way across the world.
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On_Safari
12 years ago
Quoting 'Meeka100' I do believe that Australian women are strong and independent. I don't need to depend on any man. I can fend for myself, and very well too. If this makes me what? Less of a woman, or makes me obnoxious, well so be it. I will not bow down to a man, just because he has a cock. I am looking for equals, someone I can look up to and someone who inspires me. I want a strong man. Don't we ALL!!!
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RHP User
12 years ago
wife and family have a nice house,food,education for their children,most Balinese leave school at 12....legality?...who knows...Indonesian law....but poverty is a filter for perception....as is living a priviledged lifestyle.
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RHP User
12 years ago
I don't think all eastern women are submissive at all. I have 2 co workers who have Asian wives and while they say they do have plenty done for them, they don't put up with any bullshit either. My Russian friend, she doesn't put up with shit either. I know plenty of awesome Aussie women, usually my mates wives though! Haha Off topic though, some of the comments seem a little out of order in when they were posted? Some new ones are now before the old ones I'd already read? I'm confused how this works.
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abcplus1
12 years ago
2 in fact. Both couples are happy, have kids and SHE rules the house in both cases. 1 is from Russia and is a qualified doctor (now registered here) and the other is from the Philippines and works full time ( or sure what she does).
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RHP User
12 years ago
Some people have instant posting rights, as they have been around for awhile, and others don't. A lot of people's comments need to go through an approval process before it appears for everyone to see. So the person will see their own comment on the screen, but other people will not. The approval process can take a few hours and sometimes a day. All depends.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Only this:A Filipina, say, who is investing in an australian husband, will only be fleeing starvation, disease and poverty. She will not be a boat person, because boat persons are almost inevitably asylum seekers who are fleeing persecution. This is how cruel the law is. You cannot get refugee status just because you are starving to death, only if you are fleeing persecution on, eg, religious or racial grounds. You cannot get refugee status if you are a Somali fleeing wholesale murder, unless you can prove that you are fleeing murder on one of the approved legal grounds.So the victim who marries an australian bloke because it is her only rational choice is one of the despised (by many) economic refugees. And this is why I almost vomit when I think of this whole wretched, tragic, area of human life. And of those who use it to make tawdry political gains.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Everyone will have differing points of view on this subject which will have been formed from an experience somewhere. For me, my opinion is formed from the marriage break-down of friends of ours that had been married for over 25 years. On returning from work my male friend found all his things packed up and placed in the carport with the house locks all being changed. His wife had been having an affair that none of their friends new about and decided to kick him out and shack-up with the new man. Needless to say she left our mate with trust issues of Aussie women and he nows goes to Thailand every few months for relaxation purposes.This is only one example of how opinions are formed and for me there is no right or wrong response.....only peoples differing opinions.Mr Jelly
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RHP User
12 years ago
Thank you Meeka for clarifying that for me! It doesn't take much to confuse me haha
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RHP User
12 years ago
IMO: Let's not stereotype these situations until we know the full story as to why things are the way they are between 2 individuals who have obviously come to an agreement (whether it be love or economic support)... just saying!
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RHP User
12 years ago
That it lets women escape horrible countries and regimes. BUT! What pathetic dude wants to buy a wife? Oh wait! They do ;) it's called dating. Fuck I love being a lesbian. None of that shit!- Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
12 years ago
what a beautiful,compassionate,articulate and informed post
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RHP User
12 years ago
A male perspective... I have friends / acquaintances who have gone down the "Thai Bride" path, mainly after a marriage breakup with their "original Caucasian wife". Their reasoning was always the same, the belief that they will have a better life, both sexually and a wife who will "do as they are told". Sad really, after all women are and should be equal to the male in a relationship, and if a man can't handle his partner being equal surely that is some sort of reflexion on him? Meeka, I see you have copped a bit of criticism for your forthright comments, however in my experience you are correct, go girl!!! Me, I have ventured down the "Pommy Bride" path and she is a strong willed, intelligent woman who is every bit the equal of me, (oh all right she is smarter, cuter, sexier and a much better person than I will ever be), and I couldn't be happier. The freight charge from the UK was more expensive than from Thailand though lol
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RHP User
12 years ago
who married his Thai tour guide, he just went on holidays, met a lady and fell in love.She went to work one morning, met a guy and fell in love.It happens.They have a couple of kids, holiday in Thailand to visit family etc.One of the exes cousins married a Balinese man, a gentle beautiful soul.They have children, holiday with his family, yada yadaBut.......everyday of their lives they have to defend themselves from the same type of bigoted, rascist, arrogant, narrow-minded, judgemental fucking drivel being pedalled here.Would you bag someone as a loser for marrying a coloured American, or a Collingwood supporter ?Yes you probably would.Misogynists come in all flavours, so do gold diggers.
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RHP User
12 years ago
It's a bit different when you meet and fall in love amigo. My rich white 70 Year old uncle has a 21 Filipino wife and 3 yr old child who he met whilst traveling. Do I believe it's true love.... Suuuurrreee. I am referring to guys that want a mail order bride under the understanding that they will be grateful, Or possibly subservient, or submissive.... Etc. You can not deny there are guys like that.
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RHP User
12 years ago
What you have described is two people meeting on a dating site I think. Same like anywhere in the world, same as what we are doing here on RHP. I have no quibbles about that. My comments are aimed at people that are possibly taking advantage of others who don't have other options. Those taking sex holidays to Thailand to relax because their wife left them. Give me a break. You know poor Thai families sell their young daughters into the sex trade because of all the rich white men coming over. There is nothing wrong with being a sex worker but there are lots of young women being exploited, and used and abused and I don't like it!
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RHP User
12 years ago
Gavin there is nothing wrong with your question, but the responses that I have seen posted by Meeka100 alarm me. I have a few questions though Are you suggesting that women from these countries are NOT “strong and independent”? If you have been and lived in these poverty stricken environments you will know that these women are anything but strong and independent and hardy creatures, you have to be, in a world that does not offer Center link and welfare handouts. Are you suggesting that these women are “submissive” Trust me they are not. They choose to be respectful to their husband, but that does not make them submissive. Their culture teaches them to be gentle and to obey and respect their husbands, what’s wrong with that? They are NOT pushovers. “These men are, how shall I say it, not the cream of the crop if you know” wow what a statement to make Some these men might not fit into the local Australian scene or have an 8”cock or look like Brad Pitt but they can afford to seek a woman from Asia or East Europe, and are comfortable with that idea so what EACH TO HIS OWN….Who are you to be so judgmental? Sorry just like you or I, here on this site , these men, whom you call losers choose to seek/buy /hire a bride from another country …So What? Good Luck to them
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RHP User
12 years ago
I think a lot of the comments on here are valid and there are many different experiences here too. I've learned plenty from what people have had to say, no matter if I agree with it or not. I asked for people's opinions, and got them. Mission accomplished. I did have a thought when the "boat people" topic came up. Seems funny many of the people who are complaining about boat people coming here are also unsympathetic towards the traditional caretakers of this country and their experience with "boat people" coming here! To which I say, U MAD BRO!?
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RHP User
12 years ago
This is turning into one of them forums where I sit back shake my head and go mmmmmmm WTF . So why is it some people keep referring to MEN as the only ones that are buying a mail order partner from another country? If you honestly believe its only men that are doing this you soooooo need to turn your computer off and get out a bit sorry. Many women from various countries/walks of life are doing the same. I have expat friends both men and women that have relocated back to Australia or set up house with their new partner/family in their home country, some of these were met through work, some through bars/clubs, some just in general life and a couple on dating sites. There are only two couples that I know of where I would say the wife is submissive but they love each other and that works for them. I have yet to meet an Thai or Lao woman that is not strong willed and will tell you to fuck off if she didn't like something just as quick as any other strong willed women, if anything it is the Indonesian men that I know that have married a Caucasian woman that I would say are pussy whipped. As mentioned by others its just not mail order brides that are gold diggers.
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RHP User
12 years ago
That is true, those women are strong and independent. My mistake. My views are probably being coloured by a few documentaries I have seen on men going to Russia looking for brides, and in the end were taken for a huge ride and lost lots of money, that a lot of them couldn't really afford to loose. The women looked like models and the men did not. The men were looking for a bride and the women were looking for a ticket to the States. Fair enough. But the women were also promised by this agency that the men had been checked out, and some of them had criminal convictions which wasn't good. I was also blown away by what the women were told... and of course this was a doco and they were trying to colour it in the worst light. But the women were being taught how to snare themselves an American husband... they were being shown how to perform a blow job on a banana, then the women says to them... if you really want to keep this man and make him your husband you must lick his arsehole. This is what I picture when someone mentions a man looking for a male order bride. I suppose something that you "buy" online... that grates on me. Same as I don't like arranged marriages. Yes, I agree that I am being judgemental when it comes to this.
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RHP User
12 years ago
I recently found out that there is a dating site for millionaires!!! Would definitely do that... but of course I am not cream of the crop so wouldn't get anywhere. Boo hoo. Should have a look at some of these sites. How come you can't find mail order husbands? Or can you?
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RHP User
12 years ago
http://mailorderhusbands.net/love/order/Okay, my mouth dropped open to see you put the men into your shopping cart. I guess I am the only one who feels this is all bit ... I don't know. I do see the irony as why is RHP any different I suppose.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Okay, call me a biatch if you want but that site simply can not be real. Surely???
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RHP User
12 years ago
Theres a market for everything.But if ya gotta buy one..... you're not too valuable a commodity in the free market where you live. DG
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RHP User
12 years ago
So what you are all telling me is that men don't go on those bride mail order sites.. Or sites basically where you are looking for a wife because you think the woman will be submissive. Okay I got it!! Thanks for the answers. I still get the feeling that some feel Australian women have something lacking though. No one has answered that question. As for women going on sex holidays well they are after young sexy bodies I suppose, ones they can't get at home. And I have no idea about the mail order husband sites. Didn't lo
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RHP User
12 years ago
A Filipina acquaintance of mine OWNS her ageing Ken doll of an Aussie (or Kiwi) hubby. She seems to get off on treating him badly. She also happens to be filthy rich. When it comes down to it, it's all about money. It's the same with the upper-middle class walking mid life crises with liver-spotted arms around the waist of a girl who may not necessarily started menstruating... carrying massive bags from Just Jeans and Colette, probably thinking she's brilliant. I really want to shout "Go to King Street, you amateurs," but it's better if they use simple arithmetic to figure out that it's not worth it. Now for the guys holding their trophy, dressed like a bar girl in the cesspool that is Phuket... She sees him as an escape from a hard life AND a means supporting her family back home. He's crazy rich relative to her and he's from a country in which she'd supposedly have an amazing life. He sees her as property. Can I respect a man who would buy a human being? No. Is it an insult to Aussie women? Only to the Aussie woman who raised him. When you see couples out, there's no reason to assume the bride is a MOB. The 70-something year old ass hat at the Clinique counter at the airport telling his 40ish wife that she MUST buy makeup immediately because she's starting to look old.... MOB. I sincerely hope he has some serious money and no offspring because she deserves every bit of it.
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RHP User
12 years ago
So what you are all telling me is that men don't go on those bride mail order sites.. Or sites basically where you are looking for a wife because you think the woman will be submissive. Okay I got it!! Thanks for the answers. I still get the feeling that some feel Australian women have something lacking though. No one has answered that question. As for women going on sex holidays well they are after young sexy bodies I suppose, ones they can't get at home. And I have no idea about the mail order husband sites. Didn't look any further than the one above, but that one is some kind of elaborate joke. Can I just say, I agree my initial comments were insulting but to be honest I didn't realize that men on RHP would be shopping for a wife online like that. I am a little surprised and I wouldn't have made that comment if I knew that. Maybe I do need to get out more... Have never met anyone before who has looked for a wife online in other countries. Most guys I know find their gold diggers here in Oz. (just jokes :p) . Gavin, be careful of some of those Russian marriage broker companies, from the documentary some of them will take you for lots of money and you are left with nothing, something I am sure you have already considered. It's a long way to go for a date but good luck with it!
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RHP User
12 years ago
Just Googled. No, they don't exist. Or at least the #1 is a joke.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Some men that look for a mail order bride are no different than the women who chase the young toy boy from another country, its something they can not find in their own country and its just not some ausdie men that chase a younger wife/partner. I will correct myselfe from a comment in my previous post about Thai/Lao women also. Yes their are some Asian,European women that are submissive but this is usually due to religious beliefs that I do not agree with and will not make any comment on due to my personal opion on their religion. As for Some Aussie women could learn from some Asian,Europen women. My humble opinion is yes some Aussie women can learn how to treat their partners a bit better from these women, I don't mean by being submissive either, well nothing wrong with a bit of submission in the bed room some times but that's a different story lol, and Mmm with out starting a WTF flurry of forum posts from 99.9 % of the ladies on here but some and this is just some Aussie women could learn a bit about personal hygiene, the bulk of Asian women wash after they go to the loo not wipe there is nothing better than going for a chew and it tastes and smells fresh all the time. Yes before you all hit the reply button and want to snap my neck off at the base of my cock I will state that there are many Aussie men that could learn a lot about personal hygiene also,
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'Meeka100' I am not some dumb broad without a clue about men you know. I am a little insulted with the assumption that I am stupid. Or that I am getting men only because they are so easy or because its a numbers game. That I have nothing else going for me? I have never been about picking up lots of men ever, and I don't I ever will. I understand that some men will be insulted with my view. But it still is my view. It is my opinion based on your actions .. and I understand that you would be offended. But it is still my view.You drew first with a childish blanket insult to ALL men who seek or have foreign wives .. calling them losers.The point I would like to reiterate (and it has been articulated nicely by Lady Tuscan later in the thread) is that the beloved "independent, man-less, strong woman" meme you are so vocal about is only facilitated by a fragile temporary state of affairs. It is given to you and is not something of your own making. In good times good men advocate and facilitate it - it adds depth and meaning to relationships through the removal of fear and intimidation and lessens the burden of 100% responsibility ... It will however vanish in an instant as soon as the veneer of civilization is discarded for any multitude of reasons (war was used by Lady Tuscan as an example and is a realistic example) In bad times men take back the balance of power .. the good ones voluntarily seek out and accept the responsibilities that come with that while the bad ones simply abuse it because they can... whether you like it or not. Placing yourself above all those poor women who accept and embrace the natural symbiotic nature of relationships and the genders is spiteful, ignorant self delusion.Personally I think you have it backwards. Strong, sovereign men (alpha males as they are referred to here) embrace their position and seek out the associated responsibilities .. all the while looking forward to the quiet, unfailing support and nurturing of their partner to reaffirm and rejuvenate their confidence. There are no shades of grey without black AND white.
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RHP User
12 years ago
I do not insult men that have foreign wives. WTF? That would be half my family & friends then. And I do so love my part Asian nieces and nephews. To me a man who "buys" a wife from a marriage broker or from a mail order site is completely different. Everyone who keeps talking about meeting and falling for people that they have met traveling or through work, etc etc. That's just normal everyday stuff. That's not buying someone. Have never ever put myself above other women from other countries. I am fully aware how lucky I am that I have options. Yes men can use their physical strength to subdue women. Sorry, I don't respect men that do that, and that is a nice way of putting women down Coper. More power to you though.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Hahaha! Funny. Something that has always puzzled me though. What the bloody hell is an asshat? :p
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'Copernikiss'The point I would like to reiterate (and it has been articulated nicely by Lady Tuscan later in the thread) is that the beloved "independent, man-less, strong woman" meme you are so vocal about is only facilitated by a fragile temporary state of affairs. It is given to you and is not something of your own making. In good times good men advocate and facilitate it - it adds depth and meaning to relationships through the removal of fear and intimidation and lessens the burden of 100% responsibility ... It will however vanish in an instant as soon as the veneer of civilization is discarded for any multitude of reasons (war was used by Lady Tuscan as an example and is a realistic example) In bad times men take back the balance of power .. the good ones voluntarily seek out and accept the responsibilities that come with that while the bad ones simply abuse it because they can... whether you like it or not. Placing yourself above all those poor women who accept and embrace the natural symbiotic nature of relationships and the genders is spiteful, ignorant self delusion.Personally I think you have it backwards. Strong, sovereign men (alpha males as they are referred to here) embrace their position and seek out the associated responsibilities .. all the while looking forward to the quiet, unfailing support and nurturing of their partner to reaffirm and rejuvenate their confidence. There are no shades of grey without black AND white. Oh please. What a load of rubbish. I'm fast remembering why I decided to take a break from these forums.
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RHP User
12 years ago
At the risk of being flamed and blocked, I can't really blame a man for wanting a wife from overseas. Forget the money aspect for a moment, and look at the general family values that are still strong in these countries. There are hunters/gatherers and nurturers. I may be old fashioned, but I do believe and enjoy gender roles. The days were men were men, and women liked it. To paraphrase "My Big Fat Greek Wedding" - I don't need to be the head of the household, I just want to be the woman who supports and helps turn it in a direction. I can cook, sew, keep house and create a warm environment for the man I'm with to come home to. Traditional skills and values that were taught to me as a child. Does that make me weak? Submissive? Hardly. I was also taught I could be anything I wanted to be and have been successful by many peoples standards both financially and professionally. I'm secure enough in my own strength and independence that I don't need to tell people about it - plus I'm honest enough to say that while I may not need a man to protect (or provide) for me - I would love one. I like a strong man. Australian women have become defensively independent to the point it seems to be emasculating men. Forget gender for a second and look at whether a relationship with two hunters could exist in the caveman days. Sure they may have killed a rabbit - shame no one was back at home waiting for them with a warm fire. Over the years I've met several women that have been in these marriages. Like any, some worked, some didn't. The ones that did, whether there was love in the beginning I can't tell you - but they certainly had grown to love and respect each other. The women were highly educated in their country, and looked after their family with a gusto and level of care that is to be admired. Dating these days is scary enough. I can't even imagine how terrifying it is for a man that is older, grew up with a certain set of values and is now being chastised for having them. I also don't believe that these men are unable to get a wife here. Don't believe me? Go stand outside a Centrelink sometime - you'd be surprised who is married. The comments I found most interesting are attacking those men who want a submissive partner. Given the site we are on does that mean that it is okay to be submissive as long as it is a "lifestyle" choice and not a lifestyle choice. Margaret Mead said "One of the oldest human needs is having someone to wonder where you are when you don't come home at night." I don't think we have the right to judge anyone for wanting to do that, or being brave enough to make it happen.
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RHP User
12 years ago
This is the way I see it.... Everyone on this earth despite gender, status, sexuality, economic background and so forth wants to and is entitled to find their bliss. to what each person wants is personal, to how they are willing to achieve this and the lengths to which they will go to obtain this ...is the monster they alone have to wrestle with and the consequences are theirs to live with... Unless its unlawful then your in a whole load of trouble which is not an unexpected outcome. There will always be exploitation, deception, despair, unfairness and sadness..... But in saying that there is happiness, honesty, hope, fairness and the prospect of love in whichever capacity it's given. It is unfair to say that Australian women are demanding in what they want... In all fairness we are entitled to our happiness just as much as Australian men are... So why should we settle for less than what will make us smile if your not... It's nonsensical. If statements are to be made that Aussie women should perhaps learn from our fellow Asian or European sisters.... Shouldn't these Aussie men who make such statements perhaps either be willing to offer or learn from their fellow aussie men who are in relationships ranging from lovers/ partnerships/ marriages or their foreign counterparts about the beauty of treating women with the same respect, adoration, realistic expectations, acceptability of lifestyle/ looks/ morals etc that they are finding impossible to find in aussie women? I'm thinking the best way I can summarise this is... - no one wants anyone to be exploited let alone a person from a poor socio economic background and to be that person who conciously makes that choice to exploit another human being makes you a heinous human being. - be prepared to be what you expect from another person.. - bliss comes in many forms wether it be marriage/ a partnership or independence.... (Or chocolate.. Wine... Bubble baths... A jolly good rodgering... Or two...) - if you want a mail order bride... Go for it.. It's your happiness - And if its ok and legal for people to have mail order brides/ husbands ..... Why can't gay couples in australia get married.... Aren't they entitled to their happiness too? - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
12 years ago
Played strong, done fine.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Asshat (noun): An individual whose head is so far up their own ass that said individual is effectively wearing their ass as a hat
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RHP User
12 years ago
Thanks again for all the comment and helping me get my head around it. I was curious to know what Australia people thought of the idea as much as people in other countries think of the idea too. I wouldn't use a mail order bride website to find a partner overseas now, I'd want it to be a bit less arranged and more natural than that ie. chat online, chat on the phone, fly over there and meet in person then go from there. Not as natural as it used to be but the world is getting smaller for sure. I haven't been finding my type of woman here in Australia as the type I'm looking for may indeed be as rare as rocking horse shit. As far as exploitation is concerned, the industrialised world is chock full of it. You only need to look around your own house to see examples of it, even the milk in your coffee.
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RHP User
12 years ago
BeenGoodTooLong can't see why someone would want to block or flame you for your post, like anything in this world its an each to their own and if it works for them good on them. Cheers
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RHP User
12 years ago
this was debated on another site i'm on recently. To be honest i don't have a huge problem with it. I work with children and I have often seen over the years young children with Asian looks, being brought in by Asian mum, followed slowly behind by Aussie elderly dad. The way I look at it is its a win win situation for them both, they both have needs that are being met on different levels. The guy ( Ive only really known older gentlemen to do it) is obviously lonely, and seeks company, he gets this and an attentive wife who cooks and cleans for him too. In return she gets to live a nicer life out of poverty, even if she has to sleep with an old man. They are not all wealthy men at all-very average, but to a women in a poor village they may seem the only way out!
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RHP User
12 years ago
May I respectfully differ? 'Australian women have become defensively independent to the point it seems to be emasculating men.'News to me: not much sign of emasculated men on RHP, for example, most of whom seem to have a fully occupied scrotum. "I can't even imagine how terrifying it is for a man that is older, grew up with a certain set of values and is now being chastised for having them."Well, I am older, and I recall that Greer published Female Eunuch in 1970, Steinem was in print on women's equality in the late 1960s, and Friedan even earlier. You would have to be very old indeed, or very stupid, not to have noticed that there was a significant move in attittudes to gender relationships over 40 years ago. And, of course, this victim whinging about men being 'chastised' is fashionable in a certain group of determinedly reactionary men, but it is not based on fact.Finally, I am not at all sure that there are many, if any, hunter-gatherer men left in, say, Thailand or the Philippines, where most of the women obtained by Australian men seem to come from. PNG possibly. If people wish to base their lifestyles on myths, that is fine: look how many deluded christians there are getting around. But let us not pretend that myth is fact.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Yes but we are no longer living in caves and hunting wild animals. These old gender roles simply do not apply to modern society. Hence we have men that like to cook, men that like to design and sow, and men that like to organise the home. On the reverse you have women who are very clever and successful and can earn more than the men, or women that want to be engineers, doctors, women that don't like to cook, etc, etc. I would love to have a man take care of me....... well, for me it's more that he cares for me. That he cares when I am down, or sad, or sick, and he will help me when I need him. In turn I would like to look after him, support him in what he wants to achieve with his life. We are always there for each other. Whether I cook or he cooks, or whether I wash clothes and darn his socks, or he does the washing is completely superficial and not important at all to loving each other, taking care of each other and supporting each other. In fact, I find it bizarre for someone to suggest that traditional roles are relevant to a successful relationship. Every person is different and every relationship is different. My VERY traditional Daddy who was brought up in a tiny village in the south Italian mountains, taught me to be independent. He taught me that I need to be able to support myself and look after myself because you will never know when you will need to do this. He didn't want me to be completely dependent on a man. That is not to say that I have to be the "hunter" but that I am capable of being that if I need to be.
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RHP User
12 years ago
I have been thinking about your comment. You know a person that has to take power by force may be powerful and hold the power in the relationship, but he doesn't command respect, he doesn't command loyalty or support or love from those he dominates.Men may "ALLOW" women to be strong and independent, as per your comment, but at the same time women in today's society allow men to be a dominant. We don't need men, but we want men and we love men. We care about men. I feel good when I am with a strong man and it does make me feel all girly ... and I don't know but I really like it. BUT and that is a BIG BUT I choose to be like this.... I don't have to be. I allow a man his strength or dominance, however way you would like to say it, because If I didn't like, it I would just walk. I am lucky that I am able to support myself and I don't need a man to do this.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Meeka, I am curious to know why this has continued to become about you, and not what the OP originally asked. I've talked about traditional roles in the sense that there is a nurturer and a hunter. While you may not believe gender roles play a factor in successful relationships these days, the research does suggest that for a relationship to work that two people trying to play the same role generally won't work. It's not yang and yang, and two hunters will rarely be in a successful relationship together. I know men that play the nurturing role, and women that play the hunter. I'm also capable of both and those that have met me know why I don't feel the need to justify my own situation. My point is that women have taken the feminist movement too far, it has stopped becoming about equality and more about superiority. They are defensively independent, making sure any guy knows they don't need to be protected or provided for and quite frankly it is emasculating and offputting to some men. They want to feel they have a role too. The men that are going overseas clearly want to be the hunter. They are seeking someone who will provide the nurturing role in their life. Why should they be criticised for that choice? They aren't going overseas for a sex holiday, they want to find someone they can commit to and spend their life with. The OP asked us whether Australian women take it as an insult? I don't. Why do I believe they do it? I think I've made my perspective clear.
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RHP User
12 years ago
I don't take it as an insult either. My concern has always been that some women are exploited through this process. That's all. Apologizes for developing the conversation into something else, and relating it to myself. I did assume lots of people do this in discussions but clearly not. Will bow out now. Happy sewing. :) Cheers M
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RHP User
12 years ago
Maybe that's why many of the guys with full scrotums are on here? Because they're having their balls busted at home so look for a little more excitement on here? Would explain all the complaints about married men posing as single men and "single" men who don't turn up when couples invite them. I know plenty of men in real life (not RHP life) who are well and truly "under the thumb". Always reporting to the "Minister for War and Finance". I still feel some pretty strong instincts to hunt and to protect within myself. I also feel the rush of adrenalin through fairly violent contact sports. Call me barbaric but I don't deny that urge, I manage it though and never use violence upon anything or anyone not willing to engage. Those gender roles may be outdated but the evolutionary instinct is still strong in many. Meeka, I hate seeing any animal exploited (including human animals) but the mail order brides I was referring to aren't like a forced arranged marriage. From my personal experience its like a dating site but many, not all, women are very keen to remove themselves from poor living conditions so they may indeed be willing to marry someone they may not be attracted to just to get out. the holiday girlfriend and sex trade are a bit more extreme in my eyes. Maybe I should of worded it differently. I'm not overly educated and have trouble trying to portray my ideas. Sorry if I put anyone on the wrong track.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Meeka has opened up the original OP's post to the many levels of why some men feel the need to seek a mail order bride.The conversation here has taken many turns as any good post should...looking at a topic from many points of view.My thoughts, if a man chooses to look elsewhere, fine for him.I have found these days, many men dont have the commitment to truely getting to know a woman.Cyber land has made this world a place of "I want it now'!Instant gratification is too easy to achieve but its extremely shallow.
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RHP User
12 years ago
It's ok, natural and normal for us to relate our own viewpoints and lives to a topic and to respond in the way that Meeka has. It's just like a dinner party conversation. ... Back to the topic, am I offended that some Australian men look overseas for a wife... Not at all... The vast majority of men find Australian women to be just fantastic and very desirable. Why should I be offended that a tiny minority (and really, the ones that I've known have not been the cream of the crop) don't like Australian women. Meh! Next!
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RHP User
12 years ago
Beengood many of the men going overseas or searching on the net for ''wives''are not ''hunters'',they are sad and lonely...sometimes even delusional ...and sometimes find themselves being exploited....your profile is hardly one of a submissive woman looking for Mr.Hunter to take care of her....independent and intelligent woman that you say you are ....now say thank you to Betty,Germaine,Gloria and before them Mary Wolstencroft,John Stuart Mill,William Godwin,The Pankhursts,Virginia Woolf et al......
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RHP User
12 years ago
Meeka, my apologies. I fear that my frustration with you feeling like you had to justify your choice came across wrong. I don't feel you have to justify yourself to anyone which is what I should have said. Kingoftheroad, of course you may differ in opinion. However I'm not sure that you can use RHP as a true example of the male population in general. This place has its own ecosystem and rules - and allows us to behave in a way that most of us never would blatantly in public. You are also correct on the lack of hunters in the societies mentioned, just as our own Aboriginal culture they are experiencing large issues on the disappearing traditional role of men. It's not to say that women should be less independent and capable - just that this hasn't been a smooth transition and there have been casualties. It is quite possibly what attracts them to the Australian men that go looking. I'm more than happy for a guy to play the nurturing role, and I know one that excels at it - I also find him incredibly sexy. What works within a relationship is only the business of the two people in it. My empathy for the men that go overseas to find wives, is based more on my perceived lack of respect towards men that seems to occur. Women in Australia got their equality, but somewhere along the line it has warped. I've read some of the forum topics and thought that if a man had said the same thing, there wouldn't be a safe place for him to hide with all the flames and pitchforks coming after him. Not every guy is handsome, tall, young, rich and well endowed - but they are still entitled to be treated and discussed with respect. Just as we expect to be.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Freya, I don't recall ever describing myself as submissive. As for looking for a Mr Hunter to come and take care of me? Thought this was RHP not eHarmony so that would be slightly inappropriate. Many of the men going overseas or searching on the net for ''wives'' are not ''hunters'', they are sad and lonely... sometimes even delusional... and sometimes find themselves being exploited.... If you replace the "men" with "women", and "wives" with "younger men" it could describe many of the people that are on this site couldn't it? I don't think any of us have the right to judge.
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RHP User
12 years ago
From my own personal experience with Aussie men, most of them are still married out of convenience. I've worked in big companies with lots of different blokes and not many are happy at all. I think if it was easier and cheaper to find an overseas bride, many more would. So my experience would be a vast majority of men, just gave up. Freya, without sounding like I'm having a crack at you here, honestly, how many Aussie women from 18-50 would have read or know any of those names you mentioned?
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RHP User
12 years ago
Lots of women would know those names, well, educated women anyway. I don't get it Gavin. Why do you think it would be easier to find a wife/mate overseas? I get the impression you feel you would have more success ... I tell you what, women are the same everywhere. I think you will find its just the same as RHP.... You think you have a special connection with a woman o/s only to realize she is chatting to another half a dozen men. I am interested to know how it works? If you go to Russia for example and hit it off with one of the ladies you have been chatting too. What happens then? Do you pay for her to come to Australia for holiday? I assume people wouldn't get married straight away, right? What's the process? Thanks. :)
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RHP User
12 years ago
I said IF it was easier and cheaper. I don't know if it would be or not? It might be for me as a non-drinker as many people overseas are. I seem to be treated like a freak here by many women for not drinking.
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RHP User
12 years ago
The unfortunate way these women (and in some cases men) are labelled implies that they were bought like a piece of merchandise. In reality (and I am happy to be corrected) the sites for "mail order brides" operate similar to any other dating site. No one is being bought as such, unless you are talking about human trafficking. These sites extract fees to cover costs, and yes, make a profit on providng contact details between parties to meet. How different is that to RHP, Oasis, Plenty of Fish, RSVP, Eharmony, etc. membership fees to help meet others (regardless if it is for sex or love)? I have worked with several "Russian mail order brides" who were well educated independant women. Some were genuine and loved their Aussie husbands. One was here to make her life better and as soon as her visa requirements were fulfilled divorced her Aussie husband and took him for all she could. How is this different to any regular meeting? Everyone has a valid reason for being on a site to meet a potential spouse/lover. Who are we to judge them for it unless we are living in their shoes. All relationships are open to exploitation if there is a hidden agenda regardless of how the people met. I can understand some Aussie men going overseas to look for a spouse. Unfortunately some do look for a submissive partner and are abusive to the women they marry. It is a terrible situation for the women who find themselves in this position...being promised a better life only to be subjected to the same or worse than what they left behind and being in a foreign country with no family support. I expect to get a battering for this, but in all honesty, I get embarrassed about how some Aussie women behave towards men. This is not aimed at the majority of women who are confident and independent and love their men. It is about those who treat men not like equals but like idiots. There is so much to be gained by giving both sexes acknowledgement that we are different and should be loved and respected for what we bring to a relationship. I cringe at how some of my "friends" treat their husbands. It is degrading and humilitating and when I bring it to their attention, look at me like I'm from out of space or something. Then there is the younger group of women who drink excessively only to be used and abused by the guys they meet. They have no self respect or idea of self worth. They don't appeal to any decent man who are looking for a relationship or marriage. The guys treat them as the "pump and dump" ones that complain about how men treat them but then this is what they allow to happen. I think there are many men who rightly have lost of respect for Aussie women through their experiences. To those who are looking for greener pastures overseas, all the best to you. I hope you find what you are looking for but sometimes what you seek is actually right under your nose and is here at home waiting for you to find them! SF
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RHP User
12 years ago
Sorry for the essay! LOL Thank you for the topic GavinMcsparkles....it is a subject close to my heat after meeting my former husband (Canadian) online and the constant pressure and doubt put on us by "friends", "concerned family" and government departments. I would like to say that the struggles we endured for acceptance put undue strain on our relationship which ended after 4 years of harrassment. We both needed some peace in our lives so separated mutually and respectfully. Outside interference and judgement is a Bitch. BTW as the first documented internet relationship in Australia to have challenged the Australian Immigration legislation and won, I'm glad we paved the way for many others to follow with a much easier time. Battling 4 govt departments and social prejudice was in the end our undoing but our relationship left a positive legacy. SF
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RHP User
12 years ago
read my post again,I did not say you said you were submissive,quite the opposite..as for judgeing....look in the mirror.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Australian women treating men badly? That happens ALL over the world. Believe me. Same way that there are men treating women badly all over the world. These things are not unique to any country or culture. There are good people and bad people everywhere. Someone's familiarity breeds contempt I suppose. The husbands should turn around an tell them to get fucked. I would, but then again some people seem to get off on being treated badly or are so downtrodden they no longer know what to do about it.
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RHP User
12 years ago
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