M65
Criteria's...
June 21 2012
Comments
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RHP User
14 years ago
A RHP profile is the 1st filter. If we are not attracted to the pics then finding out how great there personality is... (2nd step) is a wast of time.Don't get me wrong the friendship is important to us when establishing a regular playmate. If we are looking for JUST friends then looks has nothing to do with it but play friends its a different story. I'm sure we have said no to some great people that we would have got along with very well with (ticked all the boxes but no physical attraction). I don't think its harsh on RHP because if we were looking for just new friendships we would join a social group. With RHP there is another dimension.That said I have often thought it's a shame there wasn't a physical attraction after thinking they were great people. But its kind of hard to say to some one.. Oh we want to be friends but please keep your clothing on. Starting a friendship with rejection is just wrong in my mind.Tim
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RHP User
14 years ago
True maturity and acceptance involves respecting that another person has boundaries, as well as the ability to not take rejections to heart and allowing past matters to slide.
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RHP User
14 years ago
I agree City kitty, you should always respect the boundaries of others and be mature. I much prefer a girl being honest with me on how she feels rather than try to protect my feelings. Rejection does hit me sometimes though
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RHP User
14 years ago
Quoting 'City_Kitty' True maturity and acceptance involves respecting that another person has boundaries, as well as the ability to not take rejections to heart and allowing past matters to slide. truth!
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RHP User
14 years ago
Criteria and boundries are one and the same... This topic is about how " criteria" " boundries "effects everyone in general' not just one person.. If you read something else into it then you have missed the point... Rejections are part and parcel of what happens here on a daily basis. Every thread posted in the forums is based on someone's experience. So please' stop taking things personally...Getting back to the topic.. My question is: How many good people must we overlook because of the 'criteria' we bound ourselves to. ? I know we have done it before and will probally do it again.. Should we be so harsh or should we all soften our approach...
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RHP User
14 years ago
It amazes me that you can come across a profile that just resonates, the looks, the body, general interests, sexual interests, life experience, the lot.You craft an email that highlights these things, addresses common ground in your/their profile.And get "sorry your not my type"I have learned to trust my intuition about people and to put up as few barriers as possible to a good experience, but I wonder sometimes what such a respondent is thinking when they shut down a contact when so many boxes are ticked, surely a few exploratory emails can't hurt ?I pity people who exist in such a confined space.
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RHP User
14 years ago
Criteria...how we judge,assess or identify the people we want to meet Boundary....marking the limits of those relationshipsx Hugs H
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RHP User
14 years ago
if we didnt have criteria and preferences, how would we ever find people we are attracted to? we dont think we are even halfway critical enough...........
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RHP User
14 years ago
Our search criteria is a set of personal attributes that we require of another person before we initiate further interaction. Boundaries are our own set of rules that define how we or others act or behave.City_Kitty is right. We should be respectful of others boundaries and personal preferences that delineate their search criteria. It doesn't sound like she is taking this thread personally at all and in fact I don't think anyone is. However as rejection is part of online networking and socialising I think we need to realise this before we start and learn to not take it personally.Jay_Me, it was good to hear the word criteria used. To answer your question, yes I think meet and greets are a good way to meet people we may not normally meet due to our stringent criteria or "shield". When you think in terms of statistics the odds are are against you anyway. For instance - say we take a random couple with strict criteria. Out of 100 couples there are probably only half a dozen that meet their preferences as to location, sexual orientation, looks, habits etc. After meeting those six there are probably only two couples that they really want to play with. Now lets turn this around. Which of those two couples want to play with our randoms? Do either couple find our random couple fit their criteria? Same goes for singles that stick to strict preferences. The numbers are against them but more so for couples as both partners have to agree with another two people.So I think people that have stringent guidelines are not making it easy for themselves. But that is their choice and to each their own.
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RHP User
14 years ago
Most of the people I have connected with live interstate.I answer all flirts and messages.I am prepared to meet most people who contact me,who fit my age criterion and who I have something in common with. However this week alone, I agreed to meet two people and then they both cancelled.This happens quite often. In the three months since I joined this site I have met four people. It can be time consuming and disapointing but then you meet the one person who makes it all worthwhile...er well hopefully . xHugs Hesione Eternal Optimist
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RHP User
14 years ago
from what ive been reading on here ,,unless you find a person a perfect 10..then you cant be bothered getting to know them.im a verage joe ,polite to every one i meet ,more then happy to show respect in the bedroom and like to pleasure as much as being pleasured..but in the veiws i here im not good enough to reply to flirt or messages if i sent them.it read as if a lot of you would hook up a with someone your attract to in looks even though their brain dead egotistic and up themself..in answer to..if we didnt have a criteria and prefference,how would we ever meet people were attracted to...you do it the old fashion way ..get off the computer ,get out in public and meet people face to face..
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RHP User
14 years ago
Quoting 'bhappy2meatu' from what ive been reading on here ,,unless you find a person a perfect 10..then you cant be bothered getting to know them.im a verage joe ,polite to every one i meet ,more then happy to show respect in the bedroom and like to pleasure as much as being pleasured..but in the veiws i here im not good enough to reply to flirt or messages if i sent them.it read as if a lot of you would hook up a with someone your attract to in looks even though their brain dead egotistic and up themself..in answer to..if we didnt have a criteria and prefference,how would we ever meet people were attracted to...you do it the old fashion way ..get off the computer ,get out in public and meet people face to face.. didn't you see that we are a couple?.....our criteria and preferences dont allow for 'average joes' , as we are here, like many others, to facilitate and indulge our fantasies....that means firstly finding someone attractive, and if we decide that appearances are paramount, isnt that our business? this is the medium we use, it suits us, and if we find someone appealing, then we'll meet them, face to face, but at our leisure, and on our schedule.... if you feel you dont suit (which you dont) its then up to you as an adult, to deal with that in the proper way....with dignity and respect......
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RHP User
14 years ago
Been there a few times myself, but attraction is attraction and a "paper match" can mean so little.There are so many things, so many variables, even something as base as the mood she might be in at the time.I think it's real "in the lap of the god's" meets Lotto type stuff.You gotta be in it to win it though.Here's hoping your lucky number comes up soon bud.Cheers Felonius
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RHP User
14 years ago
AAAARGHCRITERIAISALREADYPLURALBUTEVENTHENYOUMADEITAPOSSESSIVENOUNAAAAGH!*Ahem* Sorry. Has been driving me crazy. But yes. It's interesting, I find myself a lot more open minded about potential partners here than I have been in the 'real world'. I wonder if my attitudes would change though if I was the one receiving the hundreds of messages a week, instead of the one vainly sending out the handful of messages and flirts?
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RHP User
14 years ago
Post of the week I think! In the end though, people are people, and want what they want, good, bad or otherwise.swimming against the tide isn't a healthy option.You will never convince them otherwise, and it's pointless to try.For myself, my only boundaries are do I like where your head is at, and a degree of smarts,and of course some chemistry.....the most elusive and intangible of all ingredients.Cheers Felonius
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RHP User
12 years ago
I even appreciate hearing about other people's experiences at meet n greets to get an idea of the people/person behind the profile.
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RHP User
12 years ago
is one of the things that used to bother me when trying to select from what could be an overwhelming variety of choice on RHP. Can't say yes to everyone! I really did find that meet n greets was a good way to get to know people rather than just a profile.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Sadly the truth is one of a few things here ? People can either read way to much into others profile (if they read it at all lol) they can miss read/understand what is desired by people's profile or they can just simply over judge people's profiles based on pictures alone... For us we struggle here to meet (like many we assume) however when we go to swingers party's we are both very popular and have great convos with most there (as well as sex) so we feel your pain but the fact is people over judge and it's properly based on experiences from last encounters...
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RHP User
12 years ago
I'm intensely private, and on top of that, I need to keep my personal and professional lives completely separate. I generally screen pretty thoroughly before I meet someone. As for criteria, surely it's a case of each to their own? Attraction has four equal parts for me - body, brain, spirit (heart) and that inexplicable chemistry. It doesn't matter how much a guy is a 'good bloke', if I'm not attracted across all four elements, I'm not going to be interested. I can get to know him, sure, and we might even become mates, but I won't end up in his bed.
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RHP User
12 years ago
you made me smile this morning
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'neptune_drift'AAAARGHCRITERIAISALREADYPLURALBUTEVENTHENYOUMADEITAPOSSESSIVENOUNAAAAGH! You beat me to it. By over a year Quoting 'Hesione' Criteria...how we judge,assess or identify the people we want to meet Boundary....marking the limits of those relationshipsx Hugs H But one of my favourite posters nailed it. Agree!
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'Freya77' Mrs Peachyyou made me smile this morning I was in a funny mood yesterday... hehe
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'Mesmerised' Quoting 'neptune_drift'AAAARGHCRITERIAISALREADYPLURALBUTEVENTHENYOUMADEITAPOSSESSIVENOUNAAAAGH! You beat me to it. By over a year That's not even the most 'off' part of this thread Mes, I can see why you admire our Freya, she got it
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RHP User
12 years ago
Hesione
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'Freya77'Hesione Ooooohhhhh...
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting '50zcool'It amazes me that you can come across a profile that just resonates, the looks, the body, general interests, sexual interests, life experience, the lot. You craft an email that highlights these things, addresses common ground in your/their profile. And get "sorry your not my type" I have learned to trust my intuition about people and to put up as few barriers as possible to a good experience, but I wonder sometimes what such a respondent is thinking when they shut down a contact when so many boxes are ticked, surely a few exploratory emails can't hurt ? I pity people who exist in such a confined space.Like the way you've expressed that. We find that situation confusing as well.
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RHP User
12 years ago
After a few days of no sleep & much fruit cake &,a lot of reflection can see I went waaaaayyyyy off topic. So sorry, off to live & let live :-) MR Funky (.)(.)- Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
12 years ago
Bumping up this particular thread is probably not the best way of doing that . I don't understand why you don't go to the thread in question where you went 'waaayyy off-topic'... and post there! . Your choice of course, I just don't get it.
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RHP User
12 years ago
I'm satisfied to have a big shield up to protect me because too many people are straight out liars who are prepared to attack and put other people down to protect a lie they've been caught at rather than 'fessing up to that lie. I mean to say, if they're really not lying, I'd imagine them copping their constant mistake of posting on someone else's profile on the chin, and maybe laughing along with people rather then being so nasty in and out of the forums because they got caught out. But, that's just me...
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RHP User
12 years ago
The criteria key unlocks it all. When we first ventured into the swinging lifestyle many years ago, we had to sit down and go through the criteria of what we like and don't like. For it to work for us there were a few main factors that gad to cast in solid with the main ones being, no smokers, no glove no love and also having not only a mental but also a physical attraction, as you are going to get down and dirty with someone you hardly even know. Yes having set these types of criteria into our requirements for play has its limitations, but hey, "Good things come to those who wait."
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'justjuice' Criteria and boundries are one and the same... This topic is about how " criteria" " boundries "effects everyone in general' not just one person.. If you read something else into it then you have missed the point... Rejections are part and parcel of what happens here on a daily basis. Every thread posted in the forums is based on someone's experience. So please' stop taking things personally...Getting back to the topic.. My question is: How many good people must we overlook because of the 'criteria' we bound ourselves to. ? I know we have done it before and will probally do it again.. Should we be so harsh or should we all soften our approach... We had difficulties finding others with the same "criteria" and "boundaries" as we had......We consciously and openly discussed how to attract others to us.... We softened our boundaries, we adjusted our criteria and have had so much fun since...... We are not only here to indulge our fantasies but to do what we can to allow others to do the same which in turn heightens our experience..The truth of the matter is we will never get that 19yo Bisexual nympho who is willing to please us as we wish, so its unrealistic for us to limit our criteria to seeking her.... We are not Ken and Barbie so we wont look for Ken and Barbie Simple..........We have met so many nice people since we ceased being so.... "expecting" and just got on with the fun of swinging.Therefore we don't overlook we consider each on their own merits
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RHP User
12 years ago
I can't believe I forgot... it's actually you I'm talking to... not Jay_Me at all! I get so confused...
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RHP User
12 years ago
FFS.
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RHP User
12 years ago
if you're still paying attention
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RHP User
12 years ago
👀
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RHP User
12 years ago
I've had many times that I've messaged or sent a flirt to someone who's criteria I found matching and just received a "you're not what I'm looking for..." reply. They never bothered to ask a single question or even a pic even though I clearly fit their supposed criteria. I think a lot of people ARE being quite flexible when creating their profile but then ignore that flexibility they chose to apply. I think it would've been great if people were actually true to what they want and then followed through as it would've made things a lot less confusing and not as frustrating for everyone.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'vipotato2'I've had many times that I've messaged or sent a flirt to someone who's criteria I found matching and just received a "you're not what I'm looking for..." reply. They never bothered to ask a single question or even a pic even though I clearly fit their supposed criteria. Guys meet my criteria on paper, but their profile/pics/vibe/whatever just doesn't do it for me. Say you were in Sydney, over 6ft tall and a non-smoker, the part where you wrote: (I am Looking For) "Don’t know, see what happens" really wouldn't have done it for me, no matter how hot you were. And my profile may be too specific for you, who knows? A lot of it is about gut feeling for me.
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RHP User
12 years ago
I was already over it, I do get carried away sometimes (and I know that) but, right or wrong, I was simply living up to what was expected of me LOL. Your FFS got to me... seriously, you sounded just like my foster-mother. I used to embarass her too lol. I'll try to be better, I hate being spanked!!! Cheers :-) . I do admire your persistence Funkys! Sorry if I have been critical. :-)
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RHP User
12 years ago
OMG , fair dinkum... will the Perth mutual admiration society plz stop sucking up to each other and go and find some personal happiness ? Surely there are many more interesting things to do in Perth than wanting to mouth someone who lives almost a lifetime away..' umm' maybe not ? If you haven't already noticed' I have a very big pair of shoulders and I've reached the point where I treat your mindset (and thats all it is ) as insignificant.. I gave up a long long time ago.. You have convinced some with your imaginary thoughts, including some on the eastern seaboard, but to the people who really matter' they find it just as amusing / annoying as me. Go and find something you like that makes you happy in your life... surely thats more appealing than poking holes in fresh air ?
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RHP User
12 years ago
Over it? I will say I was going to finish my post with instead of at first, but changed my mind. Next!
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RHP User
12 years ago
Peachy, Please, please, please increase the size of your bloody font !!! It's like trying to read ant tracks !! Hp xo 💌 Because I can't see...
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RHP User
12 years ago
Quoting 'Mesmerised' Over it? I will say I was going to finish my post with instead of at first, but changed my mind. Next!
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RHP User
12 years ago
Love it when our Man here loses his lolly and gives us advice on how to be Happy and creates a state of origin alliance with all the support network of the eastern seaboard being conscripted to follow..Don't need to seek happiness...It can be found observing your reaction when one dares to disagree.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Just another nonsense post from the converted.. . Not very original. Just one question ? Who is the mystery man who told you how to be happy... ? Seems a stupid statement to make. ?
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RHP User
12 years ago
You remind me of when I used to watch television. Jana or Derrin or some other shamer show. And perhaps eating vanilla ice cream while watching.
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RHP User
12 years ago
What a Gibberer. Go back to your fkn knitting FFS... Like your friend, I don't know what your problem is.. To be honest, I don't give fk...
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RHP User
12 years ago
Okay, my problem Jay_Me is that the OP, though started on your profile, is written and followed up on by Mr JJ later in the thread. That certainly gives me the impression that you are both the same person. An easy assumption to make under the circumstances I think, especially as you haven't taken the time to explain the mistake to anyone. The problem though is that you deny that vehemently on other threads in the forum... You say you and Mr JJ are not the same person. Ok then but it does get a bit difficult to believe that when you have close to a dozen of the same sort of mistakes throughout the forum. That is easy enough to check out and it doesn't take all that long to use the advanced combined with word search for people to check that for themselves. . I admit freely, that's all I know or have ever tried to convince anyone of. I've said it before, and I'll say it again, if you didn't make the mistakes, noone would be commenting on them, so please take responsibility for your own mistakes. (and grab a sense of humour). . Instead of grabbing a sense of homour, you have chosen to make me a scapegoat and make regular comments about me (without actually naming me) including calling me the leader of some 'group of six' women who are apparently, the basis of all that is evil in the forums lol. That's where it gets to be a problem for me. . The thing that really makes me wonder though is the other forumite who, after you have responded to my posts, has posted in the forums more than once that both you and justjuice have an identical picture in your pgs. We have never been friends, so they were not supporting me on that basis! I thank them for their support!!! . So I know next to nothing and that's about it. My problem though is your reactions to being challenged on it and that does concern me. Having a couple and single profile isn't a crime. . I'm glad you and Mr Funky got your shit together, he tried hard enough to apologise in nearly every forum type lol.
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RHP User
12 years ago
take me to your leiderx Bo
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RHP User
12 years ago
Truth is you have a obsession with the JJs and myself and I'm over it.. That's something you have to come to terms with. You know the real story which is not what you want to hear. Time to stop reading into things and get on with the better things in life.
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RHP User
12 years ago
read the OP again Jay,it was clearly written by just juice..you were /are the male half of that couple...why abuse people for pointing out the bleeding obvious...it just makes you appear at best a jerk.
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RHP User
12 years ago
I do prevaricate... but I don't wear lederhosen. xXx . Yer a funny bugger Mr Kink xOx
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madotara69
12 years ago
An apology to Mrs JJ, for flirting with Mr JJ. Is this fair Jay me.(sparkles)?Mado, Tara xx
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RHP User
12 years ago
Boheme , whatever... Believe what you want.. I figure the majority here have a life to get on with..
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RHP User
12 years ago
Yes' if you think this is too silly for words... you're right... the only thing they succeed in doing ' is show me the type of females to avoid... I have been stalked for ages with their silly lil detective games... Over it
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RHP User
12 years ago
I can confirm what you're saying Deb. I knew this one was a Rat when he first appeared.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Mr JJ... Have you been sprung?
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RHP User
12 years ago
In a word... NO
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RHP User
12 years ago
There is a explanation but its none of anyone's business... Peachy and co already know it,but there's no mileage in the truth... They tryed this on 12 months ago , so it's not new... Tickled... You my friend are a bandwagon johnny come lately jumper.. The only people you amuse are yourself and the other blood sucking leeches that love a drama.. Truly the pits ... Don't believe me ? Take a look at the date this was posted... It's 16 months old.. Only trouble makers dig it up.. So suck it up baby...
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RHP User
12 years ago
Jay and MrJJ are twin brothers who still dress the same on occasion. :)
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RHP User
12 years ago
but meeks ,how come jay_me's profile is now on this post which is originally a just_juice post ....Marple x
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RHP User
12 years ago
No idea........... I do believe MrsJJ said that he was over for dinner and decided to use their computer and didnt' realise he wasn't logged in as himself. Or something. I don't know. Do we care? I have seen it before though. People who are seeing each other and give their passwords to each other and sometimes they accidentally post something to the forum not realising that they are logged in as themselves! A bit annoying when you are emailing with a man and you don't realise some "significant other" who you are not even aware of is reading your emails.
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RHP User
12 years ago
Then Jay Me disguised himself as a woman and killed the professor with a candlestick in the living room to hide his crime.
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RHP User
12 years ago
..are of little interest to me. What is interesting are the Acidic Reactive responses..Objective achieved.
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RHP User
12 years ago
I'm pretty sure that dinner comment was where the forum regular from my post first made mention of identical pictures in the two galleries. There's a post by Mrs JJ and another post by the same forum regular about the identical pictures on the thread 'Would you have sex with the person posted above' thread from 4 months ago .
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RHP User
12 years ago
Yes, you're right , you must be, dopey that is. Your words, not mine... Meeka, , I think you suspect the truth , you bounce all around it without actually saying it, but saving face is a much easier option than admitting you got it wrong. Besides' the same group of women' coming back in some 16 months later, with the same old accusations says plenty. No matter how many times you try , all it does is show your ignorance..
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RHP User
12 years ago
All I know is quite a few things don't add up. And I like to know whether it's Dr Jekyll or Mr Hyde I'm talking to. . You know Jay_Me, about that 16 months, what you might not be taking into account is that if you keep poking the sleeping bear (as you do regularly with your posts), it will eventually wake up and want to know WHO is the problem.
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RHP User
12 years ago
always reveal the nature and character of the poster...if you want to know exactly who some one is,just read their posts.How they speak about others,whether individuals or groups...this reveals their attitudes and predjudices...one of my selection criterions is this,the deciding factor as to whether or not this is a person of good character or not .
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RHP User
12 years ago
You got that right... If you care to back track and read some of the anti Jay posts ' it sticks out like the proverbial dogs nuts.. Peachy... you just cant help yourself.. You just had to have another go and try to open old wounds in the hope of a different outcome. Funny thing is ' I'm lucky to recall what happened with me yesterday, yet you can tell the world what (you thought ) I was' or was I doing 16 months ago.. If thats not stalking.. what is .. ? "Mind your own business" seems the appropriate word.. live and let live' turn ALL that negative energy into something positive . Perhaps Mr Peach would like that too ?
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