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“So I pashed-on with this root-rat behind the bottle-o last night… slipped her a couple digits then smashed her guts in. She finished me off with a wicked gobby… spoofed everywhere!”

If you’re not familiar with the Aussie vernacular, the above may read like gibberish, but for those who speak the tongue, it’s a rather colourful account of a sexual liaison between two very eager and liberal participants. 

With Australia Day just around the corner we thought we’d list a few of Australia’s more colourful sexual terms, the words, the phrases and their meanings… enjoy ya drongos!! 

Axe wound – Vagina 

Baby batter - Sperm

Balls Deep – Intense penetrative sex

Bang – To have sex

Bangs like a dunny door in a hurricane – An enthusiastic sexual partner

Bar up – To get an erection

Bat off – Male masturbation

Bearded Clam – Vagina

Beast with Two Backs – To have sex

Beat ya meat – Male masturbation

Beef Curtains – Vaginal lips

Bit of Skirt – A Woman

Bonk – To have sex

Boof – To have sex

Bump uglies – To have sex

Cop a length – To have sex (said to a female)

Crack a fat – To get an erection

Crack onto – To come onto someone sexually

Dud Root – Poor in bed

Five knuckle shuffle – Male masturbation

Flog – To masturbate, or another word for wanker

Franger – Condom

Front bum – Vagina

Frothin’ – Female sexual arousal

Fun bags - Breasts

Gangbang – Group sex

Get ya knob polished – Have sex (said to a male)

Gobby – Blowjob

Goes off like a frog in a sock – An enthusiastic/great sexual partner

Got the hots – Yo have sexual interest in someone

Map of Tassie – Female pubic hair

Moot – Vagina

Mrs Palmer and her five lovely daughters – A male’s hand when masturbating

Mutton dagger – Penis

Nuddy – To be naked

On the pull – To be trying to pick someone up

Pash – To kiss passionately, to make out

Perv – To look at someone or something with sexual interest

Piss flaps – Vagina

Pull – To meet someone new and have sex with them

Put one through her – Have sex with a female

Root – To have sex

Root-rat – A promiscuous person.

Smash her guts in – To have vigorous sex with a female

Smash ya back out – To have vigorous sex

Snog – To make out with someone

Sprog - Sperm

Spunk – Sperm, or the act of ejaculating

Starkers - Naked

Tickle ya bean – Female masturbation

Tickle ya budgie’s tongue – Female masturbation

Tits out for the boys – A chant said to women, usually by a group of men

Toeyer than a Roman sandal – Sexually aroused

Tongue punch the fart box – To lick/stick the tongue in the anus

Tosser – A slight, someone who is thought of poorly, “a wanker”

Tube steak - Penis

Tummy banana - Penis

Up the clacker – Anal sex

Up the date – Anal sex

Wanga - Penis

Wank – To masturbate

Wombat – Someone who eats, roots (see ‘root’) and leaves

Wristy – Hand job

Did we miss any? What's your favourite Aussie slang? Share with us below in the comments!