Well, New Year is upon us, so I’m sure you’re not the only one frustrated with broken resolutions at this time of year, however wanting him to be more than he wants to be is undoubtedly your first problem.

A very simple exercise involves you imagining that he is nagging you equally as hard to do things his way. How would you feel about him? Romantic, loving, sexy? Would it inspire you to do more or less for him? So why do we think something that won’t work for you, will work on him?

This kind of nagging, no matter how well meaning, is often enough to drive a man straight back to the safety of the couch, TV, food, alcohol, other women, mates or similar male comfort blankets. In no way does it inspire a man to be his best. And worse still, it will erode the value he places on you and the relationship.

So if you want a man to change for the right reasons, there are really only three things you can do

1) The long term method:-
Leave him alone until he is fed up with himself. Sound crazy? Well it works a treat. A guy left to his own devices will often tire of his own behavior, and when he does, reflection kicks in.
Call it Karma or whatever you like. It’s that moment when his life flashes before his eyes and he suddenly realises what a bore he has been and how awesome you have been for allowing him to be himself and loving him anyway. This is the moment when a selfish, rebellious lout morphs willingly into a loving compliant puppy – How do I know? Well it worked a treat on me.

2) The ‘Get A Life’ Method:-
If you can’t change him, change you! Simple science really! And let’s be honest, much easier. Just learn to care less, until what he does no longer bothers you. Let’s remember you had a life before him. So get on with it now. No one died and made you boss of him. You’re not his designated nurse maid. And I’m sure you have lots of people, places, friends and fun to be had, distracting you from the need to nag.


3) Associate what you want him to change TO something he cares most about:-

But don’t expect that something to be, you, your wishes, your rules or even your happiness. This technique works a treat in all areas of life if you can nail it. Be that talking to your boss, family, friends or anything else that requires you get what you want. It does however take a little thought and an ability to suspend what you think he likes and wants, for what he truly likes and wants.