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The 10 Rules to surviving Adult Sex PartiesToday I’m going to talk about something of which I know about first hand. I’m going to talk about adult sex...

Christina Miller | September 16 2014

The 10 Rules to surviving Adult Sex Parties

Today I’m going to talk about something of which I know about first hand. I’m going to talk about adult parties.

My first party experience was quite a while ago but its memory is fresh as though it just happened last weekend. I remember feeling excited and terrified all at once and spending the night paralyzed on a couch that was against the wall, watching and absorbing my surroundings.

Embarrassing as it may seem the reason for my inability to move away from that wretched couch was that my mind was blown away with what it saw and my body was unable to move as there were no precedents to guide me through what I should do.

It was the best and the worse night, best because it was the beginning of my journey of my sexual discovery, and the worse because I wish I’d use that night to enjoy myself. The reason behind writing this little piece is to save you this same fate and give you a head start.

My husband and I, being sexually adventurous had discussed venturing into the world of ‘swingers’ and swingers parties but had no idea how to approach it and no knowledge of the rules to survive any adult party. To make matters worse there was nothing to fall back on; no articles and no one we knew who we could freely ask questions. Being brave, we walked in and if things got weird we decided we’d just walk back out, hopefully still in one piece – naïve.

So often we try to play it down but it is a big deal taking this step into an open relationship and go to an adult party, walking away from the fear and guilt that society instills in us.

To dispel any fears, delusions or even panic or paralysis (chuckle), I thought it might be an idea to write some tips and rules you absolutely need in order to survive an adult party and you can thank me later.


Rule#1 Look the best you can (hot)

Party goers don’t have to be Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie (we wouldn’t complain if they were) but they must show that they look after themselves, good physic, good hygiene; the short of that, scrub up well. Goers generally are couples, singles ladies and a few selected single men who are presentable and have great people skills. Guests are willing participants who enjoy sex and aren’t afraid to explore their sexuality.

Rule#2 Expect things will get steamy

When you first step into the party venue it’ll feel like any other swanky cocktail party. Pretty, sexy women and suave men sipping champagne, vodka or whiskey on the rocks, chatting away in groups, while a reel of porn plays on the flat screen TV on the back wall. That’s when you start to feel the underlining intent.

Rule#3 Let your inhibitions go, because people are about to get down and dirty

Some parties are themed but at the bare minimum sexy or very sexy is the general requirement. If you are a first timer you might quiver in fear and in excitement and if you have been there often you’re excitement heightens as signs of opening of the naughty games start to unveil. There are some ‘playrooms’ for those who got winded up early and sex begins. Let go, don’t think about it, and enjoy the party for what it is: a gathering of likeminded people who share the same interests.

Rule#4 You have to be naked in the playroom

Whist the rule is naked if in the playroom, you’ll find that not everybody’s ‘pleasure’ revolves around being in the playroom. There are diverse sexual fantasies at play in these parties. Standing, peeking in are the obvious voyeurs who wait all week for this type of opportunity to get their juices going.

As a warm up when all parties are happy, women playfully kiss each other and the men get warmed up with the show right in front of their eyes. Others have an appetite for the single men - the more the better. Some women enjoy a lot of attention and what better than RedHotPie Parties!
Whether it’s your first time or your one-hundredth time, it’s important to stay grounded and in touch with yourself as thing happen at the parties, and trust your instincts.

Rule#5 Know your boundaries

Keep in mind that your boundaries are important and if you are not ready to try something new just say no this time or until the time you are ready. It’s also worth remembering that boundaries change and it is ok to re-evaluate them from time to time.

Boundaries should be discussed among couples but you’ll quickly learn that people feel excited and more alive when they stretch their boundaries and grow from the experience. It doesn’t have to be a big leap even small ones can create these feelings. This is the fundamental of these parties, an opportunity to grow sexually alone or with a partner. Parties are a chance for self-exploration

Rule#6 Women run the show

Every night is ladies nights, sorry guys. Women call all the shots. Participants can have sex with their partners, swap, or hunker down a bag of popcorn and enjoy the show. Anything goes, as long as everybody involved is in agreement.

Rule#7 It’s Hot!!

It’s definitely hot. Just let go and don’t think about it, enjoy the party for what it is –SEX PARTY – a gathering of like-minded people who share the same interests – sex, lots of sex and variety sex.

Rule#8 Get Involved

While you could choose to just watch, it’s way more fun when you get involved.

Rule #9 Don’t Hesitate

There is so much fun to be had. Even if you decide to stick to one-on-one encounter once you turn around you’ll have an amazing show of naked bodies busy with all kinds of position and sex - who needs porn!!

Rule# 10 Move on & out

Once you get that point where you’ve seen all the sex you can see for one night. The magic of the evening is starting to wear off then is time to take a break, have a drink or just pack up and leave.


Overall parties are and should be a sex-positive place where likeminded people explore together and where there is someone out there to suit your particular needs and tastes to your sexual discovery. These parties provide the platform for people to try things, to intentionally test and bend their personal boundaries, slowly or not, as long as no one is getting hurt and everyone is taking the relevant precautions. Then we’ll just let everyone get on with getting it on.


Feel like adding your own tips; feel free to enrich our experience of the parties and RHP. If there are any funny stories of your first-time party please share….