probably the same parcentage as women that do.. LRE

Well spotted. Cheers Wilds

Why is it always the guys that get picked on in here, amazes me, women are not all sweet and innocent as everyone predicts them to be, trust me, i know a few who people think the sun shines out of their backsides but little do they know.

I would say from the amount of girls not following up on dates, that it is all about the need of feeling wanted and desired. It is a human desire to be desired. I a guy or girl get attention from here maybe they will have no need for touch from another. although this is miss leading and pisses a fare few of members off. they aren't going to tell you because them people wont chase and show interest. This goes for guys and girls. Im upfront when people ask my situation and I have friends on here that know where Im at. Although I meet and cheat (if thats what it is) they know my wife and yes I have met some of there friends for benifits. We ALL have needs and if they were met at home with respective partners, things would be different. for example I chat, meet and Yes! NOT cheat sex in the city prety much covered why a male will cheat and I've seen why a lady will cheat. It is as explaned above. Have fun play safe be prepared to accept the consiquences. Guru xx

I dont think Lithium intended it to be an insult to men, just asking how they feel about it and after all this is "girls ask" so would be silly to ask what women think....although i do have first hand knowledge that even what appear to be the nicest,kindest,blah,blah guys still cheat. (as with women) lol... :) I met my ex which is also the father of my 2yr old daughter, we met on a similar site around 2001 after chatting for a couple of months and he was married and ironically had a 2yr old daughter at the time, I dont condone cheating at all, it was convenient at the time to have sex with someone whom i didnt think would want anything else from me, that was until he started sending flowers, the whole movie style deliveries and id never exerienced anything like it and even though it ended crappy i was a loud and proud man hater and he opened my eyes that not all men were like that........He treated me like a princess. Well obviously he isnt that great if he could do what he did to his family, at the time i didnt know what it felt like to be a parent. He did the right thing and admitted all to his wife and they separated immediately and next thing we were living together. Anyway sorry got side tracked, i dont think he intended to fall in love with me as i didnt with him so yeah he set out to cheat but it led much further, and when youre cheating or being cheated on thats always a risk u take, u cant choose who u love and you cant choose who your partner loves.. Cheating is wrong to begin with but once youre in that situation its not so black and white when feelings start getting involved. Judge not lest the be judged yourself (men and women!)

Good point sugar blue, I am outta here, bye

What about the women here who are in relationships and "cheating" by chatting/flirting/swapping pics? Or is it OK when women do this but cheating when men do it. There are men and women here who are carrying out online fantasies without any intention of taking things further.  Just as there are men and women here who are cheating on partners for various reasons, maybe they are in relationships where regardless of the effort they put in their partner has absolutely no interest in sex at all Or maybe they are just playing out some online fantasy for a bit of spice in their lives, something they may or may not see anything wrong with. Or maybe they are just the type of person who regardless of what their partner does or does not do are habitual cheaters. It is though very narrow minded to think any of this behavior is limited to just men.

wow you people sure know how to turn nothing into something, i DID not say that it is only men that cheat. i did not say anything even remotely close to that. i havent written a statement. it was a question, to the guys, about guys behaviours because i know how women behave and more importantly i dont give SHIT because i'm not dating a woman. yes women cheat thats not the issue here. read my post properly, get a grip and reply to the subject at hand or dont reply at all?!

If you are going to reply to a post why dont u actually read it all before jumping to conclusions, both lithium and myself made it clear that it wasnt a man/woman thing just that the question was being asked to men. After all this section is GIRLS ASK.....A Place for women to ask men all the questions they would like answers to, or didnt you read that part either?? Perhaps if you took it to heart it is you with the problem. If i were a man i would take the oppourtunity to be honest and share so women can change their views and learn more about each other just like men asking women questions. If we assumed all those stereotypes were correct why would us girls even bother asking the questions?? Im so sick of men getting all "yeah but women do it to" like every question we ask is a sexist statement when women (for the majority) are really just asking men questions, asking for their opinions and experiences, not asking for defensive and arguementative responses. Both men and women have vintage stereotypes of each but without asking questions or answering questions honestly how in the hell are those stereotypes meant to de-bunked??

For me, the opportunity has never really come up, so my intentions haven't been tested. Generally I see this as a site where a guy has to make the majority of the moves, as the girls really do have the power of choice. I do admit the harmless flirting does give me a nice feeling all the same. John

A very interesting post & one that's been on my mind.  Wouldn't it be nice to know the answer to that question before you make contact with a person so you know where they're at! For me, it's like this.  Been married a LONG time to a wonderful lady who came from an extremely stiff-collared family.  She'd never even seen her mum naked that she could remember.  Very insecure about her body, and took a long time to loosen up about showing off with the lights on (despite my open adoration for her every facet).  The single biggest turn-on I get is from seeing her aroused, but she doesn't like to talk about what turns her on, and.... eh, if you wanna hear my life story you can ask. I really enjoy flirting with the ladies around my life, at work & sport & BBQ's etc, but I would never want to risk falling in love with another woman by taking any of those flirtations any further. What I'm looking for is someone who is just after a good mutually enjoyable romp, with no desire for dinner/drinks/flowers etc.  I would need to make emotional connection along with the physical, but an in-the-moment connection, not a life-bonding one.  I thought that only men thought this way, but some of the lady's profiles on here made me wonder.

To be truthfull, that may have been me in the past.  Perving and hoping that it may happen magically (from behind the LCD) but not upgrading, not intending to waste anyone's time but i guess reluctant to really go for it 100% However I am now serious (in the minority on this site it seems) and not here to be mucked around.  As for those that chose a higher than thoust in the gutter attitude.. everyone's situation is differant, so try a mile in my clogs before you casually take a flame to me! It has actually taken me some time to be honest with myself that liberating my sexuality (no not out of the closet just out of vanilla once a month) is good for my physical, mental and relationship health.  I am a brutally honest person - to my own detriment at times - but life is not always as black n white as some of these flamers would like to enforce. Call me strange but the reason I seek a casual or Fukbuddy situation is (and this only my view) I would feel far, far more guilty having an affair (which although there have been opportunities I have not accepted) behind my partner's back. Humanoids are messy complicated things and enjoying life to it's fullest (including sex) is so important.  If you can minimise the harm to those you love and others on the way through and achieve happiness then that is the combination for you. Anyway life is short, each to their own. Great post BTW

I am a married guy and yes i come on here to find someone to meet,not just to chat to or flirt with.

Well for me, initially i stumbled across this site some time ago, and as joined as a non financial, guest member, without my wife knowing- i guess mainly for the 'perv' factor(as most other married men with non-consenting wives would probably admit too also). Just checking out pic's, reading the forum, checking out the profiles etc- not a really a contributing member as such- just another married bloke having a perv. :-D., and feeding a taboo fantasy.. That has changed recently. Like most red blooded married aussie blokes, i too enjoy the freedom that the internet provides to have a sneaky perv, a fact my wife has always known & accepted, but never really indulged in with me. A few months ago, we discovered the joys of digital photography, and decided that as an extention of that, we thought about how much fun it'd be to show a few of our personal pics off. So we put a couple up on a different website that not long after we joined, changed direction to become a more 'safe for work' photo website, so we had no where to show our pics- thats when i remembered RHP. So we joined as a 'premium' financial couple... (although, for one reason or another, we still haven't submitted any pics to the Red Hot Pie gallery- soemthing we'll get around to at some time..) So this site has become something that we now enjoy immensely together. When we joined and filled in our profile together, we thought what better time than now to indulge in another long held fantasy we've discussed(MFM). Yep- strange as it sounds, the thought of sharing and watching her having playtime with another fella, is a long held fantasy of mine, and now is hers too, as it turns out (lucky fella me hey  hehe ;-D). Just quietly, the response to our profile has been unbelievably overwhelming. We've had a heap of fun ever since we joined together a month or so ago, replying to messages, sharing pics, msn'ing(is that a word?), and camming with a select few we've met through this site(It is simply not possible to respond to ALL the messages and flirts we recieve). So much so, that the 'fantasy' is know being discussed as a possible viable option for us(lucky me again..). We still haven't taken the plunge and introduced the third dimension to our bedroom, but we sure are enjoying the attention, and meeting & chatting & flirting with strangers in the mean time. Got a little sidetracked there, sorry.. :-D To answer your question- yes, i did initially join to have a little harmless perving & flirting, but i never had any intention on ever straying. Just a little bit of cheeky fun on the side. Completely different story now though :D

I was in that category up until recently. Unfortunatly for me I was caught out which ended our realatioship of 6yrs. I seen the net as not being real at the time and tried explaining it to my now ex. I now realise that the net is real and everything I did was real to her she seen it as I was being unfaithful. I am now single and looking to move forward.

Well now you know hey? Smart

I do know now. It is unfortunate I learnt the hard way though. I just have to remember that life goes on..

Flat out getting a reply to a flirt or email!!!Cheat?Yeah,whatever.

Surely for those women who see RHP as cheating then the same is to be said of going to the pub on a Friday afternoon and talking to another woman. My ex had no issue with her going to the pub and talking to others, but heaven forbid if I dared to talk to another woman. Got to the point I recieved a phone call @ work on Friday night @ 5.30, you on your way....

 

Going to parties with her friends I was ignored so found conversations with others at the party and pointed out my partner in the conversation. I guess I just naturally prefer to talk to women, always ended badly.

 

However only joined RHP after the initial break up, just to see what was out there and reassure myself that I wasn't really abnormal that others felt the same as I do about adult past times. (sex is for fun)

i think if you wouldnt do it with ya partner there its cheating...and u r bein deceptive and lying....i get quite alot of men wanting 2 cheat in my messages n i hope there wives found out and hit them in the back of the head with a fry pan then take everything