I love being a man..i dont find it a burden being a provider or having to look strong etc..i may live on my own and only have myself to look after, but i have always wanted to pay or be a gentleman..i think as i have got older i understand what being a man is more..

but hey i still have a tear during a chick flick, i dont need to be macho just a normal man..in heels !  lol

IF.....

IF you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too;
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or being hated, don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise:

If you can dream - and not make dreams your master;
If you can think - and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same;
If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build 'em up with worn-out tools:

If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breathe a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: 'Hold on!'

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
' Or walk with Kings - nor lose the common touch,
if neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,
If all men count with you, but none too much;
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds' worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And - which is more - you'll be a Man, my son!

***

Personally, a man to me doesn't have to prove himself to anyone, he has confidence and self-belief. Then again, a woman should be the same - there's no reason why the above stuff wouldn't apply to a woman. I respond very well to strong women. I've spent too much time criticising gender roles to put too much faith in them (in theory)!

Asking the hard questions.

Is the answer 42....oh no thats that other question!

To me, I think it is to be the provider, yet accept it's a team effort.

To give your partner freedom to grow, explore and fight their own battles, whilst knowing when to step in if needed.

To listen and encourage.

To indulge in mutual sillyness and make her laugh. (my fave job)

To be around for the kids as much as possible.

To be the one to keep it all together when things turn to shit.

To remember her birthday and our anniversary...lol

Cheers Felonius

is someone who

- has strong character, knows what he wants and goes for it

- has a soft nurturing side that no one else sees

- knows his mind but is open to new things

- has a sense of humour and doesn't take himself too seriously

- is happy to be in an equal partnership

- someone who will look after and protect me and sweep me up in his arms

- a sensual lover and maybe a little dominant too sometimes

- is strong, confident and can take charge

Hmmmm....sounds like someone I know

SF xx

You know.. when "The Great War" broke out.. kids as young as 14 signed up to go, to fight and die.

They were men.

the soldiers themselves.. were men.. SOME were Gay, BUT, they were MEN

And, the Women?? we can say "They were MEN" too.

My point here is reasonably simple.. (in my craggy head...) "We are always on some ill gotton search to categorise everything in our lives.."

"What is love"

"What is a real man"

"when does a person get referred to as Bisexual"

"When is a girl a slut"

look at the lyrics below..

was the cowboy a man for riding bulls?

a man for calling his wife and asking permission to come home?

For hinting to her he was a cripple?

for reading what she said.. and heading out the other way?

Or was he a man for any other reasons you may gleen from the song?

BECAUSE: just about any response Meeks will get from her post, can be answered (pro AND con) in the song..

AND furthermore.. a decent woman can fullfill virtually any requirement those answers may cover..

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Silence in the line

Took my last fall in San Diego
Bus headed north one headed south
I call a farm in Colorado
And I lift a dusty pay phone to my mouth


She says hello I say it's me hon
Sorry I stayed away so long
Tell the kids thier old man's through with playin' rodeo
Cause if it's alright with you I'm comin' home

Well there's silence on the line
She says you sure did take your time
But I still need a man for the things a man is good for
You know how it is raisin' crops and raisin' kids
Demands a man at least as fit as you are
So come on git on home there's hay that needs a mowin'
A boy that needs a whippin' and a hundred things to do
I hope you've finally found your mind
To leave that rodeo behind
I've spent half my life just waitin' here for you


I guess that nows the time I'd better tell her
Hon I've got this old friend that's here with me
He used to be a cowboy and a good one so they say
But now his legs are crippled he can't walk you see
But hon you ought to hear him tell his stories
Sing the old songs play the guitar too
I'd really like to show him Colorado
But I thought I'd better leave it up to you

Well there's silence on the line
And now I hear her sayin'
Babe I only need a man for the things a man is good for
And you know how it is a place just half this big
Demands a man at least as fit as you are
Put yourself in his place it'd awful hard to face
All the chores and work and nothing he could do
If you want to know my mind leave that rodeo bum behind
Don't waste our time I'm waitin' here for you


Well cryin's just for kids I put down the phone
Fumble with my crutches movin' slow
I wish that I was on the bus that's Colorado bound
And I hope the weather's nice in Mexico

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Cavey.. always in a cave

First point...physical height doesn't equate to 'manliness' or any kind of strength of character. I've met plenty of tall pussies and plenty of short incredibly masculine men. "manly" or masculine is a character test, not a physical one.

Being 'manly' can include having the strength of your convictions, being a man of your word as in acting it as well as saying it, of being the protector and strength, the direct and focussed to the woman's emotional roundness and flightiness, its being clear and strong enough if your own self and identity not to let anyone or anything impact on your esteem or confidence, its having compassion and empathy but the strength to fight when required, its knowing when to be open and vulnerable and strong enough to allow yourself to do so despite fear, its having the ability to love and kill in the same moment if required. Being a man is about leading your woman with an open hand and making her feel safe enough to follow without question, knowing that she's valued and loved and protected, but also knowing there are clear boundaries in place for game playing and bad behaviour, being a man is knowing you can walk away at any moment and still be happy and that any woman would be lucky to be part of your inner circle.

A manly man can be any age, size or shape.

A manly man has strength , not just physical,he shows when he is vulnerable,is kind and compassionate. He is empathic, has courage and integrity.

He laughs,he cries,and he loves like there is no tomorrow....and of course his taste in women is impeccablex Hugs H