All jokes aside now....

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All jokes aside now....

Jun 22, 2012
inspirit   Woman 49yrs
If sex between 3 people is called a Threesome and sex between 2 people is called a Twosome...
Then I totally get why everyone calls you handsome!

What do premature ejaculation and hide and seek have in common?
  Ready or not here I come...

I filled out an application today. One of the questions was give an example of team work so I put down "gang bang". Guess they didn't like my answer.

How fast can a girl fuck?
Only 68 mph because at 69 they flip over and blow a rod. ;-)
Jun 22, 2012 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
jensman1903   Man 49yrs

Okay, I've got one for you. Now stop me if you've heard it.

A guy was going down on a prostitute. Not really a good idea, I don't recomend it but he was into this sort of thing. So anyway, he's growling her out and he comes across a split pea. He spits it out and looks at her but says nothing. He shrugs his shoulders and continues on. Shortly he comes across a chunk of carrot. He sits it out and looks at her again. This time he asks, "Are you sick?"

"No" she says, "but the bloke before you was."

Jun 22, 2012 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
inspirit   Woman 49yrs

that's just wrong Jen lol

Advanced Sex Positions for Cowgirl

1: Tie his limbs to the bed
2: Take up position of cowgirl
3: Tell him you have AIDS
4: Try to stay on as long as you can
Jun 22, 2012 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
wannabyummymummy   Woman 36yrs

love a laugh

good ones there.

what do condoms and coffins have in common?

well they both have stiffs in them except one is coming and one is going..............


Jun 22, 2012 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
neptune_drift   Man 29yrs

This one usually gets me in trouble

Q. What did one tampon say to the other tampon?
A. Nothing, they were both stuck-up cunts.
Jun 23, 2012 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
QLDtwo4fun   Couple Man 52yrs Woman 41yrs

Have you noticed condoms now have serial numbers.....

You haven't....Aren't you rolling them down far enough.
Jun 23, 2012 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
Smilingwithfun   Man 53yrs

Rulers

Mines 12 inches long but i generally don't use as a rule.
Jun 23, 2012 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
jensman1903   Man 49yrs

Actually, Wannabyummymummy, condoms have more in common with wives than coffins.

They both spend more time in your wallet than on your cock.
Jun 23, 2012 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
inspirit   Woman 49yrs

2 lads shopping for mothers day cards

Lad 1: Why are there so many more Mother's day cards than Father's day cards

Lad 2:Everyone knows who his mother is
Jun 24, 2012 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
jennylee1903   Woman 46yrs

3 men were sitting in a spa when a condom floated to the surface.

1 man asked, "okay, which one of you farted?"
Jun 24, 2012 Report Abuse  |   Reply with Quote  |   Reply Reply Post
irish44you

...

Quoting 'neptune_drift'
    Q. What did one tampon say to the other tampon?
A. Nothing, they were both stuck-up cunts.
   
i can see why....Quality!

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